I Finally Have the Nerve to Admit…

Hubby left me! Tuesday night. He ran off with two bitches. Not just any bitches, either. Bitches wearing matching maroon bandannas! Thinking they were all cute and stuff.

He’s probably with them this very minute as I sit at home updating my blog. Alone. Even my son abandoned me (had to go to PA for work).

So I wonder what they’re doing right now?

I imagine them having heart-to-heart chats…

And he’s probably giving them ear massages…

Not just quickie ear massages. The full treatment. Where he starts at the temple, then moves back behind the ears…

I wonder if they know he’s got a wife at home? All alone. Lonely without her man.

I’m sure they don’t care. Bitches like that probably don’t even feel guilty.

In fact, they’re probably laughing to themselves, muttering to each other in that crazy, semi-silent, bitch-speak that sounds mostly like whining.

Saying, “Nyah, nyah, we’re here and you’re not!”

I’ll show them. As soon as I finish work for the day, I am leaving. I’m gonna pack my stuff, hit the road, and drop right on in to the middle of the party.

“Enough of this frolicking without me!” I’ll say.

I wonder how the bitches will feel about that?

I’ll let you know when I get back.