She had been sick lately and in the hospital, but was doing well and was expected to be coming home soon. Although she’d been fighting scleroderma for 19+ years, as well as pulmonary artery hypertension, her passing caught us all off-guard.
She was one of my most-faithful blog readers. Even if she didn’t comment on the blog often, we often talked about my posts.
That anniversary party was one of her happiest moments. She was quite proud of the fact that she and Dad had been married for 53 years. And she was not at all happy to spend their anniversary in the hospital. She was so looking forward to being released so they could go out to dinner together…
Mom wasn’t shy at all about letting everyone know what she was up against. Scleroderma is a rare disease, so she talked about it often to make people aware. Knowing she would want her vast network of on-line friends to know the details of what happened, I posted the text below on her Facebook page.
Mom landed in the hospital after experiencing a heart attack on Monday, August 6. She did not even realize she’d had a heart attack until late Tuesday night (August 7) when blood work done during a routine visit on Tuesday morning with her rheumatologist alerted the doctor. She went to Johns Hopkins Bayview Campus on Tuesday night. By Wednesday, doctors realized she had some blockages around her heart, which needed stents.
She was transferred to Johns Hopkins’ main campus for the stent procedure (via cardiac catheterization). Three stents were successfully placed on one side. The plan was to wait a day or two and then go back in to place a fourth stent on the other side. There were issues with some of her blood counts, which caused the stent procedure to be delayed. They didn’t want to release her before doing that procedure. However, after several days and several delays, they realized it was an iron deficiency causing the odd blood fluctuations.
Doctors decided to give her the iron she needed, send her home until that leveled out, and then re-admit her for the final stent. She was actually in great spirits. She looked and sounded better than she had in months.
Then late Saturday night into early Sunday morning, something went terribly wrong.
The doctors are not entirely sure, but believe it was either reflux or something else aspirated into her lungs, which caused enough stress that it caused a cardiac arrest. They worked on her for about 90 minutes. For a long period, CPR compressions were the only thing keeping blood flowing to her brain.
Against all odds, she fought her way back and was relatively stable. She had a breathing tube in so couldn’t speak, but was responding with gestures to questions being asked of her. It was clear to the nurse that she was aware. The nurse let her know her family was in the waiting room, anxious to see her.
Blood drawn during the event indicated another blockage, which had to be addressed. They took her down to the cath lab and were just about to prep her when she crashed again. This time, they couldn’t bring her back. We never got to say goodbye.
As horrible as it is to lose her, for her sake we’re glad it went quickly in the end. She’d had enough. Her health had been slowly deteriorating over the past 19+ years, with the last year or so being her toughest.
It was always Mom’s wish to be cremated and keep the farewell as simple as possible. There will be a memorial service on Monday, August 27 at 12:00 PM at Rosedale Baptist Church, 9202 Philadelphia Road, Baltimore, MD 21237. As much as she loved flowers, Mom always said she would prefer contributions be given in lieu of flowers to The Johns Hopkins Scleroderma Center, 5200 Eastern Ave, Suite 4100, Mason F. Lord Building, Center Tower, Baltimore, MD 21224. Tel: 410-550-2003
Donations can also be made on-line at https://jhweb.dev.jhu.edu/eforms/form.do?formId=11950.
This is the last photo I have of my Mom and I together. It was taken in late-June. I actually wrote about that visit here.
She really enjoyed that visit. As did I.
I love you, Mom. You’ll be missed.
My sincerest condolences on your loss. Man that sucks.
So glad you were able to spend some quality time with your beautiful Mother so recently. I’m sorry.
We are so, so sorry about your mom passing away. This must be a really tough time for you and your family, but I know you will have the love and support of Mike, the kids and your friends. I’ll be thinking of you on Monday, and sending you virtual hugs. Love, Annelies and Yves.
I’m so very sorry to hear of your loss. I know these simple words are paltry in the face of what you’re experiencing, but I do hope you find comfort and solace in the arms of your friends and family and all who knew her. Your mother sounds like she was a lovely lady and I’m glad you were able to visit with each other recently. All my best wishes to you and yours.
My thoughts and prayers are with you Kathy! I am sure you will miss her terribly just know that she is in a better place. Your blog made me cry my mom and I are more like sisters and best friends as she had me so young. I hate that she is so far away now as we used to spend alot of time together.
I’m so very sorry to read of your mom’s passing, Kathy. :-{
I don’t know the right words to say. Part of me is pretty sure there aren’t any.
Wishing you and your family peace.
::hug::
So sorry for the loss of your mother Kathy.
Doris, for certain you have been carried away on the wings of butterflies and a symphony of hummingbirds. You leave us mourning with your family and your friends. You have always had my gratitude for knowing your true spirit – kind, helpful, reaching, curious, so filled with empathy for those around you. You taught me much about all these elements of life. Rest well in your new surroundings. There are many who will guide you as you walk among them walking among us. You are as near as a butterfly, infused with the colours of a palette made just for you. It’s possible to imagine how free you are now, but I will only know that for certain when I see you next. Thank you, my friend, for more than you know 🙂
Kathy, I’m sorry I can’t be there to provide physical support, but emotionally I’m there for you. Please let me know if there’s anything I can do. And if it’s ever late at night and you just wanna talk, well, that’s when that whole time difference thing will come in handy.
I am so sorry for your loss Kathy. I can’t imagine what you are going through right now. I am tearing up just thinking about it.
Please know our hearts are with you.
Kathy:
I am teary eyed too. So sorry for your loss. Unexpected is the worst as there was no time to say goodbye, nor prepare . . .
sending you the best wishes we can in this time of sorrow
bob
Riding the Wet Coast
OMG, I’m so sorry. How sad. Our condolences to you and your family.
I’m glad you have good memories and that your mom lived a long life. Maybe those facts can leaven your grief. Our deepest sympathy.
Thanks, all. The kind words help.
Your in my thoughts and prayers Girlfriend.
You were blessed with a good mom .
May you find peace and comfort in your shared Treasured memories.
Love Ya
Trace